10/31/13

Halloween, Halloween, Halloween.

While wrapped up in my comforter eating fun-sized kit-kat bars on Halloween’s eve, also known as “devil’s night”, I can’t help but think about my own feelings about Halloween. At this point yall know that I am the queen of conflicting opinions. I’m conflicted about a wide variety of subjects, for example, the Petra Collins vagina shirt, the fact that Raven Simone wasn’t in the last Cheeta Girls movie, and even the idea of marxist feminism; but the holiday on the 31st of October throws me for a major loop.

First and foremost, may I just say I do love Halloween to a certain extent; nothing excites me more than free, high-fructose corn syrup byproducts and elaborate, obscure, homemade costumes, all in a tipsy haze. HOWEVER, Halloween is one of the most racist, sexist, uncreative and peer pressure induced bullshit holidays of all time.

Racist, in the fact that racially insensitive assholes run rampant on that night, people are actually dressing up as Trayvon, I kid you not. If you want to read more about racist Halloween costumes and cultural appropriation, my babe-friend Bailey wrote an excellent piece on her blog about that very subject, click here. For some reason, assholes think blackface is okay on this day, they think that dressing up as a specific culture is okay, they think just because everyone is drunk and it’s a holiday that it is a get-out-of-racism free card and that is just NOT the case.

As a child, I always thought that ghouls and witches came out on Halloween night, but as I’ve grown older, I realize that it's really just undercover racists who come out of the ether, showing their true colors to humanity and frankly it's as disgusting as….well it's actually the most disgusting thing I can think of... Trayvon REALLY (still not over it in my head), who would ever think that was okay?!

 No one ever wants to be called racist, because no one thinks they are being racist, but lets me just make this as simple as possible to you, if you are telling a race related joke or wearing a stereotype costume of a culture that is not yours, it is NOT okay. That being said, take your sombrero and giant mustache off and sit the fuck down plz.

Sexist, in the fact that people feel pressured to dress “sexy.” I know that I have shown more skin on that night in years prior, because of this general consensus that yes, this is the way it is and this is the way you will dress. Now this is not the case for everyone, many people like exploring their sexuality and wearing less clothing, because it’s more fun to them and for them I say “YES,” Do your thang! Wear those booty shorts and have fun! My problem does not lie with those people, but with the people that feel that they have to dress like that as well.

And if you are reading this and rolling your eyes, please just hear me out. People feel this way. Not everyone, but people do, and it’s important to be sensitive to other people and not treat them differently for wearing a giant squirrel costume ala Brita from Community or dressing as an “ex wife” ala Cady Heron in Mean Girls. You should feel free to wear WHATEVER you want, so express yourself, and have fun just be comfortable in what you are wearing (especially the shoes!) and don’t subject yourself to the patriarchal standard of a costume with the modifier “sexy” before it, okay?

Uncreative, in the fact that if I see another pre-made costume that was sold in a plastic bag, I will scream. I’m sorry but I think those costumes are SO BORING! Look at these costumes, they are literally the exact same costume template, all based roughly on what looks vaguely like the German Dirndl. But this costume is altered by color to fit completely different characters, and it's all made in the cheapest grade polyester!

When I went to the Halloween store I was just shocked at how many stale, obvious and sexist/racist costumes were pre-maid, bagged up ready for a boring person to buy. I’m sorry if I seem harsh, but literally, these are so OBVIOUS. I'd recommend you think about what characters you like from shows, movies or books, and I’m sure you can come up with something way more badass and authentic, and you can save $40. Case in point DailyGrace’s video “Cheap, Dumb Halloween Costumes,” or just use one of my ideas from earlier this week ;)


Throughout each of these points, I’ve touched on peer pressure, but what I’m getting at is, Halloween is FULL of peer pressure. Peer pressure to be sexist, to be scandalous, to not be offended because, “It’s Halloween, bro,” and to drink, and what I’m trying to get at is, DON’T LET IT GET TO YOU. 

While I may sound like a D.A.R.E officer right now, what I’m saying is important. If you want to do Halloween right, wear what you want, get creative, don’t be racist/sexist, drink responsibly and don’t let anyone tell you otherwise, okay?

Lastly if I have to hear that Valley Village Radio ad one more time, I will actually murder someone. THEY DON’T EVEN HAVE VALLEY VILLAGES IN HAWAII! WHY IS IT PLAYING ON THE RADIO! IT MAKES ME WANT TO ACTUALLY DIE, DIEEEEEE
So pussycats,
be safe, have a great day
and please keep it sassy,
xoxoxoxo
Sasssquatch

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