10/5/13

Featured Guest: Alexi Wasser

Photo from FADER
Hello Pussycats,
Today's featured Guest is none other than my favorite blogger of about all time, Alexi Wasser, aka Imboycrazy.com. I've featured here before click HERE, so I just thought I'd compile my favorite excerpts from her famous segment, The Blind Leading the Blind.
  1. always have a sexy bathing suit and a FAMILY APPROPRIATE bathing suit on hand.
  2. you know it’s serious when you’ve only just started texting back and forth with a new guy you have a crush on and you guys already have a “load earlier messages”!
  3.  eye fucking isn’t cheating… is it?
  4. in a perfect world, the guy you’re sleeping with is the same as the guy youlike.
  5.  if the exercise calls for any more intense footwear than keds, don’t do it!
  6. Drink coffee or don’t drink coffee, but don’t drink decaf coffee. fuck you!
  7. all the resentment in a relationship begins during the trip to pick the other person up at the airport.
  8. stop fronting so hard! it’s embarrassing. WAY more embarrassing than NOT fronting!
  9. dear bonehead, you can’t use driving as an excuse not to call someone. you can only use it as an excuse not to text.
  10. texting with someone every day is not the same as talking to them everyday. talking to them everyday means telephone calls. Don’t let the future & technology ruin the intricacies and romantic aspects of our culture and take away intimacy.
  11. please don’t pick out the crust of your eye and then roll it off the tips of your fingers while you’re in public and talking to someone. it’s fucking disgusting. or at least don’t do it around ME. i always have this horrible fear that YOUR eye crust is gonna end up in MY mouth!
  12. If you’re not ready for marriage- just use the “I’m not getting married until everyone’s allowed to get married.” marriage equality excuse. It makes you seem like a good person, even though you’re not. (oh whoops- i just read the newspaper.)
  13. If it doesn’t look good on the MODEL, it sure as hell won’t look good on you.
  14. Girls: next time you pull up next to another girl picking at her face in the car next to you: honk, yell, knock on the glass, and do whatever it takes to get her attention and snap her out of her self sabotaging skin picking trance! We are women! We MUST stick together.
  15. If you see a girl with toilet paper stuck to her shoe or blood seeping through the back of her pants, you MUST tell her in a sly, subtle way that doesn’t get the attention of anyone but the lame loser it’s happening to.
  16. Girls: working out together and then binge eating at a self-congratulatory/celebratory brunch afterwards negates the ENTIRE workout! This is why I don’t believe in exercise OR friends!
  17. Dudes, if any part of you wants to woo me, date me, kiss me, sexxx me, or love me (or ANY girl for that matter)… can you please NOT talk about your ex girlfriend(s)? I want to pretend, for at least a moment in time, that romance still exists and that we are in a bubble where only you, me, and possibility exist. Is that ok?
  18. REAL friends don’t let you ask for a ‘to go’ box!
  19. Always be in the bathtub. Metaphorically speaking. #stateofmind #wayoflife
  20. patchouli is never ok!
Those are my favorites but I most certainly recommend you check out her blog and tune into her radio segment on wednesdays.
She is so cute and she makes videos and yes. Do it.
Have a great saturday
and please keep it sassy
xoxoxoxo
Sasssquatch 

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