2/10/12

Flippin the Bird.

While it is the month of romance (and black history)
I am single.
and slightly bitter
so I thought I'd tell you all a tale of a little bird that I love to flip.
"Flipping the bird," "the middle finger," or whatever the hell you want to call it, is an obscene hand gesture in Western culture. Used to imply nonverbal messages along the lines of "f**k you, you flea bitten whore," or maybe something like "screw off you wiener!" or "up your ziggy with a wa wa brush, " whatever your implications the general meaning is the same and either way its an unwrapped and unreturnable present from someone who has a problem with you.

Apparently it originates from ancient Greek comedies where actors would use it as an insult to imply that person submits to "anal penetration," which is always something a crowd will laugh at (especially a crowd of teenage boys)

As a young child I remember attempting to flip the bird at the blonde girl who hit my face in dodgeball but my fingers were so unused to that action I had to hold down all of my other tiny fingers and lift my middle one up with the other hand...those were the pure days

Now I feel my two little birds have lost their chirp, the middle finger has lost a majority of its zest due to the regularity at which they fly. The bird has no longer become one of those doves released from a cage after MJ was proven not guilty, they are not special, they are mere pigeons in the grand scheme of birdhood. 

BUT this is not to say everyone feels that way,
I will never flip people off when driving because you must remember a 4 thousand pound hunk of metal can crush your tiny birds as fast as you can say "tweet!"

If you are single, happy almost valentines day
if you are not...try not to wear out your birds
have a lovely thursday
and PLEASE
Keep it sassy,
oxxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxo

4 comments:

  1. I have, on many occasions, flipped the bird while driving, and every time I do I instantly am terrified that the person I just flicked off has a shotgun on their passenger seat and is about to shoot me. My most favorite subject to flip off is the random man on the street who has just yelled something obscene at me.

    ReplyDelete
  2. Ahahah, I've never ear flipped the bird before, but it's so cute!! I'm starting to use this expression right now!!

    ReplyDelete
  3. Caelan! It's Caroline/Limey!
    I deleted my old blawg and started a NEW ONE with my friend Stefania
    so you should check us out
    MISS YOU
    love,caroline+stefania

    ReplyDelete
  4. Haha yous story of little you is so cute and funny! I can totally imagine you having to hold down your other fingers. XD

    ReplyDelete